I’ve been exploring and embracing all the different sides of myself lately and it has come to my awareness how much I have suppressed and dimmed many sides of myself.
So, I asked myself…. why?
Society teaches us that we have roles to play, and that they are often associated with what we do for a living.
We are by definition that thing…
This has always been so limiting for me and likely the reason I left my corporate job behind to become an entrepreneur.
On maternity leave I didn’t know how I was supposed to go back to work 9-5, be that side of myself for 8 hours a day and then come home and play an entirely different role. Well, several roles actually. The mother, the cook, the cleaner etc.
It was all too much for me to handle.
In my mind working from home and being my own boss meant time freedom, unlimited creative expression and fulfillment…. or so I thought.
What I’m realize now is that even though I made the decision to work from home full time 8 years ago, I was still struggling with the same issue that I would have, had I decided to go back to my 9-5.
I’ve been limiting my creativity and forcing myself to niche my life down to the one job role that defines who I am to society.
For the last 8 years that role has been “Photographer”.
By giving myself that job title I limit myself to all the other things that I AM, because in my mind (based on conditioning) I can’t be it ALL at once.
I have to choose.
Or I put my entire value and my worth on how well I perform doing that ONE role. Even though I know deep down that I am more than just a photographer, everything else becomes secondary or of unequal value when it comes to my worth as a woman.
Can you relate?
Plus, when I dim myself by defining myself by that one thing, I see that area of focus/job as heavy and limiting.. regardless if its my own business or a 9-5.
I get restless and find excuses or daydream to do something else during my day. Not because I don’t enjoy my work as a photographer but because I still crave that freedom of expression to be all kinds of creative.
I think a lot of us feel this restless energy (a need to be creative) and we don’t quite know where to throw ourselves outside of our typical day to day roles. Our lives become more like a list of to do’s instead of :
“What can I create today?”
“What facet of myself will show up today?”
Entrepreneurship was supposed to bring me freedom.. So why do I feel restless and limited when I’m defined just as a “Photographer” or “Mum”?
It’s because I’m not JUST a photographer or Mum.
I am a HEALER & EMPOWERMENT CATALYST TO WOMEN, a BUILDER, an ARTIST, a WRITER, a DANCER …among many other things ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
These are parts of me and always will be.
Now, I’m open and tapped into what wants to come through on different days and I just flow with it.
But that’s only because I made the conscious choice to explore the sides of my creativity and talents. Not because I was taught that I could be many things at once. It took time an effort to step into who I AM, why is that?
It goes back to that question we were all asked as kids.
“What will you be when you grow up?”.
or in other words “How can we define you through what you do for a living?”
It’s our role as adults and parents to change the context of these questions for our kids.
Because the ultimate freedom is embracing the fact that we are multifaceted creators!
I am not defined by my job or even by my role as a mother. My creativity shows up in a ton of different ways and I take on different moods and personas throughout my monthly cycle.
We are not taught this in school!
Why is this not common knowledge? Women ARE cyclical beings. Our inner world is not linear despite what we’ve been led to believe and what our outer world reflects to us daily.
So find many ways you can create!
Even if you work a 9-5 out of the house, you always have a few minutes to tap into how you want to creatively express yourself each day. To tap into what your body is feeling that day outside of your roles. You just have to nurture that awareness.
This for me is the ultimate path to fulfillment. Being tapped into our bodies and our sense of innate self-worth.
I always brushed off all those other sides of my creative expression as hobbies & distractions from what was most important! (ie. what brought in the MONEY!)
When in fact they are what ENERGIZE me to live the life I love. All sides of my creativity are what make me ME, regardless if I get paid for doing them. The worth of our creations is not dependent on a paycheck.
So, embrace ALL that you are and don’t limit yourself to defining yourself as one thing. You are MANY beautiful things.
An amazing way that I have learnt to tap into the different ways to embody my creativity is through cycle awareness.
Planning certain activities and work around the different phases of my menstrual cycle.
Yup, I said it. My cycle helps me figure out my work schedule.
I know, it’s totally weird and different from the linear masculine conditioned way we have been brought up to believe as “normal” – but tapping into different sides of my creativity during certain times of the month has been proven to be SUPER powerful.
I don’t take photo shoots during my moon time. Instead I write, I craft, I CHILL and all of those things are just as powerful and VALUABLE as my pre-ovulation and ovulation weeks when I’m busy shooting, renovating and networking.
I have a guide that dives into the different cycle phases – feel free to ask me for a free copy.
You can also embody the different sides of yourself and your creativity through clothing or what you physically surround yourself with at the time. Different music, people etc. during different creative phases.
Step into those roles fully and feel your inner creator coming out in all its beautiful expressions! Through them you will start to tap into all the different sides of who you are beneath what you do for a living.
How are you expressing your creativity today?
I chose to write!